Category: Uncategorized

  • Why You Shouldn’t Do the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol Alone

    Why You Shouldn’t Do the Ideal Parent Figure Protocol Alone

    And why a facilitator makes all the difference Nobody knows, on a deeper and more visceral level, what it means to be betrayed by the world quite like someone with attachment wounds. The very connection that should have uplifted us and supported our development was the very thing that broke…

  • Tools for expressing anger in a healthy way

    Tools for expressing anger in a healthy way

    Anger is not aggression. Anger is not abuse. Sometimes it can lead to abusive behaviors, but more often than not, anger is an emotion. You just feel it and ask a question: Why am I feeling this way? Am I being disrespected at the moment? Do I feel in danger?…

  • The power of cringe

    The power of cringe

    When was the last time you’ve been embarrassing and you’ve allowed yourself to be seen? Now, if you are anything like me, your life is riddled with not so gracious, wish-I-could-forget moments. But that’s not what I am talking about. I am talking about not hiding those moments. Not hiding…

  • Life not quite what it should be

    Life not quite what it should be

    Now you are here. How did you get here? You look around and you see people who are more successful than you, healthier, in loving relationships. People who go out on a Friday night. Perhaps you go out as well, if only the people who you meet would know you…

  • On the Power of Grief: When Feeling Pain Is Healing

    On the Power of Grief: When Feeling Pain Is Healing

    I don’t know if it’s just me, but one of the phases I went through in my “healing”—God, I hate this word—journey, was acting tough. But not merely acting tough. Finding that it’s useful to have this sort of “don’t fuck with me” demeanour, and in a twisted way, it…

  • When you’ve been criticized your whole life, even feedback can feel like an attack

    When you’ve been criticized your whole life, even feedback can feel like an attack

    One of the ways growing up in an unsupportive or invalidating environment affects us is that we can become very sensitive to criticism. We get so accustomed to people having a poor impression of us that we almost always predict others will have a negative opinion of us too. When…

  • The Fight Trauma Response: Being Stuck in Criticizing and Attacking Others

    The Fight Trauma Response: Being Stuck in Criticizing and Attacking Others

    The fight trauma response is rarely observed in moments of introspection. It takes an honest and brave person to notice themselves fiercely attacking others with bad jokes, sarcasm, insults, or even outright violence. But what exactly is this response, and how does it impact relationships? What is the Fight Trauma…

  • Finding Love After Betrayal and Abuse: How to Navigate Unsafe Waters

    Finding Love After Betrayal and Abuse: How to Navigate Unsafe Waters

    What Happens After Betrayal and Abuse Betrayal and abuse leave deep scars, often manifesting in patterns that keep individuals stuck in emotional pain. These patterns typically include: How Does the Worldview of a Victim Change After Toxic Relationships? Experiencing betrayal, emotional manipulation, and lies doesn’t just hurt in the moment.…

  • What’s Up with Psychology, Parents, and Your Love Life?

    What’s Up with Psychology, Parents, and Your Love Life?

    There’s a lot of talk about childhood trauma and how your relationship with your parents impacts how you approach relationships as an adult. But what does that really mean? For many, this idea feels vague. At first glance, you might think, “My relationships now look nothing like the ones I…

  • Here’s why giving avoidants space is a bad, bad piece of advice

    Here’s why giving avoidants space is a bad, bad piece of advice

    Allowing your avoidant partner to come and go on a whim only fulfills their needs and completely neglects yours.  Key takeaways: If you suspect your partner is dismissive-avoidant or fearful-avoidant, giving them the space necessary almost feels like a life hack. They always bounce back with enthusiasm.  However, is it…